Babbling~

Damd! Im awaked! I sleep about 10.02 pm. I thought its morning already. Then i looked at the clock still 12.43 am. What the~ What the~~Shut up! Gosh!
I thought i could sleep more longer like usually before. I really don't know whats make me wake up. Because of my stomach hurt? Naaah. Huh~ Susah ini macam. = =".
I really got insomnia. I think~
I try to get sleep again. I closed my eyes. Suddenly my love history appeared in my minds. I try not to opened my eyes. Then all my love story flashback get into my mind. I can see my ex face. The way he laughed and smiled. The way he touched, the way he hugged me and those kisses.
Arrgh~~ when will i washed away all that damd things in my head..? wish i could formatting my brain again. Its really haunting me. I couldn't stop thinking of him. I knew i still love him damd much. I can't stand this anymore. So Im awaked.
If i get onto my bed again, the same thing will happened. Thats why i have to sleep a lil bit late.
Its my habit already. How should i do with it~~Tell me? Urgggh! duh~?
Now, im nothing to do much. Writting some of my thoughts in my blog. Listen to Praise and Worship songs. Makes me really calm and peaced. Love God!
ooh! ooh! Today i met my best friend Hui Foong at the parkson. While she eat the waffle. Damd i miss her. She looking pretty. Really miss her. >_<

Am i ready yet?

Hello Blogee.
Today is a really Sunday boring. I forgot to go to church today. Forgive me God.
I slept very late last night. Maybe around 4.10 in the morning like that. I think so.
I break the record. Sleep in the morning everyday. Like vampire. Whatever~~.
I woke up around 11.30am like that. Maybe. I'm still sleepy at that time. My dad woke me up because he want to take me to eat at the 2020 cafe. Really famous cafe though.
We always eat there. Ha ha. Beware if you see me there. Ha ha. Naaah~~
I oso got a great news. U know what? I just received an SMS from my best friend, Tessa. Thank God i had her. She SMS me send my ex new phone number. I glad i found it. My ex use Celcom. I knew it from the beginning he will use Celcom. He told me before.
Well, what should i do with his phone number? I'm not ready to text him to tell the truth. Im really nervous. I don't want to keep this pain forever. I want to let him know how i am feels right now. But I don't know how. I really scared to face it. Please Help Me God! Give me strength to face it. Urgggghhhh~~!

Mood break time :)

Ola Blogee..
I have a great fun today cause i can go out and take a walk to the mall. Parkson actually.
Well. Sis invited me . So i joined her. Not only us. I got my Aunty also to joined us too.
Nothing do much actually. Me and my sis just follow my aunt to see some clothes. Then my aunt told us she want to try the jeans. She off to the fitting room.
and we're wait. Im kinda think crazy a bit suddenly. So i went to the fitting room. Then i go check it out. WOW! Awesome Geeshh! Nice fitting room. The funny is.. this is my first time to get in that fitting room. Sakai! Watever!
Very large space. Maybe can take my whole family sleep at that room. = ="
Mirror! Im really addicted to mirror. Really nice fitting room. Without wasting my time, suddenly my ideas poked me. So,i take my own picture. Tadaa! = ="

Life Unfaithful..

Im so sick being like this. Why all this must keep repeating the same thing? Why it doesn't want go away from my head? I breakin my brain out. I dont even know what i should do to stay away from this dilemma.

Im really depressed. Its really hard to forget someone who we really love for such a long time. A person that i really really love. A person who really really care about me too much. How should i forget all his kindness and honesty for what he had done to me until he willingly sacrifice something that can't be doned by other peoples. He is the only one person that really care me and love me too much like no one do. Im really touched. I feel whole of my body paralyze. I didn't know how amazing this love would be. Cause i never feel falling in love like this before in my whole life. Really! Cause i didn't know how to love someone before. Thats true.
When he appear in my life, then i knew what love is. He teached me everything about it.
Love is beautiful, isn't it?



Now, since his gone, i never see him again. Never feel his love again. About a month already. I cannot SMS or call him anymore. He changed his phone number. Im really sad. I really wish i could see him just once. This dilemma will after me if i didn't see him. I try to find him. But in the end i know i couldn't. Im giving up to find him. I cried alone in my bedroom. Thinking of him, thinking of his face. The way he talk to me before. Thinking the way he touch and kiss me. I cried badly. Then I ask myself, am i doing something right? or am i too stupid that im still loving him and think about him everyday? until when? Oh Lord. What should i do to stop this?
Im really desperate for him. Really need him on my side again. But i know i would not be happend.
I really miss him. Honestly, i never stopped thinking about him. I dreamed about him every night. I know i still love him. But do i have to? Should i? I guess i dunno what the answer is. Only God knows how much he so mean to me. Like the Revd. say. "leaved and Forget all the bad things that he had done. stop think about it. Its already happened.Think of his goodness that what he had done to you. That come from his pure heart and his soul. And not to willing to hate him cause it never have the ending. But must love him cause he belong to God too". I love to heard his word. Really make me relief. I feel peace. No hate but love.
I tried to hate him b4 . But sometimes i changed my mind in a minute tried not to hate him. This is what i call hate but love. I still remember his word. He say he will looking 4 me. But he didn't. Then why now Im in hurry to look after him? I wish i could say that i will always waiting for him. But how long? will i made it? or will i don't. I know, i have to accept this test of life. But i always giving it up. Feel like i cannot continued my life again without him. I think im a loser. Failed to achieve something in life. What should I do with this life God? Im so weak.

Yeay. At Last!

Hello mr blogee.. me again :)
Well.. what should i write huh?...
Ok..
Today me and Sophia going out. We go to Parkson. Herm. Y Parkson? = ="
Never Mind.
I acompanied(is it correct) her to Popular bookstore to buy something.
Haiz. So lama u Pia..ehe. Sorry for babbling.. :P
So i left Pia with her friend. While i go to somewhere else in the shopping complex looking for somethings that i want to buy.
Walk alone....like crazy person.. = ="
I go to the second floor. Suddenly i saw my schoolmate. O my gosh! Its been so long i didnt see him.
His name is Edrin. Ya! My buddy last time.
Then I also met this guy name Izzat. herm. Not quite sure that his name. HUH!
Could not remember his name la. Then i met with Nora. Also my Schoolmate. WAH!
Miss Them. TADAA! Its my new jeans! = ="( Sha Gua..Ehek.)

My New SKINNY JEANS! :P

Haha! Sorry for my crazyness here. Haha.
Yeap! My new skinny jeans.
Honestly i never use skinny jeans before. But when i wear it, i feel like im new person. I can see my own bodyshape and my butt also. Haha.
SO HAPPY LIAO!:P






p/s: Sorry 4 my broken english once again. I dont know y my english is poor. :( Dont ignored it ok.

Im Boring...

Hello blogee..HmmmH~~
Im so boring today.. got nothing to do.. haiyer.
Why must be boring hah?!.. Damd hate it!
To let myself not be boring, i go sit outside of my house eating my "Longan". (= =)

Ermmmm~ Yummy!

Me eating Longan. = ="

Like i told u.. so damd boring. Huh....~~~

Sleeping Habits. Haiyer.

What are u looking at? O_o

Ok. Its about 4.41 am.
Huh. So stupid i am. Just want to Korek my biji mata already. If u ask me y....
I cant sleep... Haiya. Tats y.. =..=
Its already become my habit sleeping this late. If i have a boyfriend, i will sleep earlier. Wakaka.
Thats truth oo.
Now im still single. Whos want me anyway. Heh.
Wait God sent me one. Hehe. Hope the good looking one. Hehe.
Now u see. No boyfriend i will sleep late. Until i really cannot sleep.
Yaya. My eyes open for 24 hours. I wish anyone could Cucuk my mata so i can sleep. Haiyo!
Pecah record me already. wakaka.
Imagine if this time i go to work...
Apooo! i think my eyes like Panda already. . .
Now im very sleepy. Stupid. Morning can sleep. Nite cannot sleep.
Better i become Dracula next time.
Eat "Lobak" blood. haha. Can oo? Ur still my big bro oo. Go bully u again.
Ur face scary me too much. Wakaka.
Bring me nitemares saja. Haiyer.
Dunno how to stop dis habit. Im addicted to it ba.
Damd it!!

Alone & Boring =.=

Huhhhh~
Quite sunyi my house today. Ya la. Me Alone. Grrr.
Want to invite frens. How?
They working. huh.
Damd bored. Got nothing to do. Just play on my laptop this whole day.
Play the YM stuff.
Lucky i got frens to chit chat with. Hah.
I tot i could go to limbang today. But mom didnt want me to go with them.
yaya. Got some money problem actually. Poor mom. She has to pay all my cousin n nephew plane tickets include herself n my dad and sis.
But its ok. they can pay it back later. Nga..nga.. nga..
Herm. Now. What am i suppose to do.....?
Grrr.
play online again? Too bored ...
BORING!

.Ursulla.

He is My past.My memory.

CLAYTON & URSULLA

He is my past. Everyday im missing you.
I know we're looked cute when we together.
We also make our own dream together.
I really wish our dream come true.
But now. Everythings gone. All Gone.
We have to let go each other. I know we're not meant to be 4ever.
You're right. We're just like Romeo n Juliet story.
Both parents disagree with each other.
But we must continued our life right?
Now, u're not here beside me. And i dont know where u are rite now.
Now. Im glad that i could forget you.
Its for our good.
But i always remember you for what u hve done to me.
Thanx 4 ur honest. Thanx 4 take care of me.
Thanx 4 loving me like no one could love me like u do.
Thanx 4 always be on my side. Thanx 4 making me laughed.
Thanx 4 making me happy. And Thanx 4 Everything.
I always miss you .

.WILL MISS HIM.

.MY LOVE STORY ENDS.

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me

This lyrics are meaningful to me :'(

" WHEN IM WITH HIM I AM THINKING OF YOU."
20.02.06-29.05.09

.Ursulla.

We Love You Aunty :'(

Me and my family just lost our beloved relative. She is my aunt. I really dunno her name.
but we called her Jessy Mom (Indai jessy).
When mom called my dad phone.. my mom voice turn different.
Then i knew something when wrong.
Then dad said to me.. She gone. Im shocked!
I know she sick.
I dont believed she's gone and leave us tat quick.. :'(
I could not stop my tears from falling. I still don believed she not "here" anymore.
Im really badly sad..
Me and my family decide to went her house tis saturday to Limbang...
Im really speechless.
We really dont believed she's gone...
really dont believed it.... :'(

Saints of God, come to her aid!
Come to meet her, angels of the Lord!
Receive his/her soul and present her to God the Most High.

May Christ, Who called you, take you to Himself;
may angels lead you to Abraham's side.
Receive her soul and present her to God the Most High.

Give him/her eternal rest, O Lord,
and may Your light shine upon her forever.
Receive his/her soul and present him/her to God the Most High.

Let us pray: We commend our sister, (Indai Jessy) to you, Lord.
Now that she has passed from this life,
may she live on in Your presence.
In Your mercy and love, forgive whatever sins he/she
may have committed through human weakness.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
Amen.

Aunty.. we will always remember you in our heart forever. We will always love you and Miss you. May You rest in peace with the Lord.